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Armed and Dangerous with a Credit Card

By Alexis Andrews
October 02, 2008

I am dangerous when armed – armed, that is, with credit cards, and dangerous to myself. I can sit at a computer desk all day, without uttering a single word, and you would not know that I am on my way to demolishing my fiscal year. Thanks to Internet shopping, eBay, Amazon, and coupons and online discounts, I have now grown to become to worst and most compulsive online shopper that I know. Point, click, read review, compare price, copy coupon code, paste coupon code, add to shopping cart, click, and –voila!– a relapse made official.

This week would not have been so bad, if not for a late collapse at Sears. I had been doing relatively well, you see, without a major purchase credited to my Visa, until I checked out their Fall catalogue for Women’s Fashion. I tell you, there is something about those bright and colorful banner ads on the Internet browser, and the sparkling smiles of the store’s anonymous models; that must have been why I had succumbed to the temptation of browsing through Sear’s online-only sale, Midnight Madness.

Can I brag about my finds, however weak and eternally flawed they have made me feel? Because of Sear’s profanely ridiculous online discounts, I gave in to buying three new tops: A Sag Harbor Crocheted Cardigan which I can use on a day at the beach ($6.49); an Apostrophe Square Neck Tunic to wear on sunny days and coffee shop meeting with girl friends ($8.99); and – my favorite – a black Scarlett Sequined Tank Dress which I hope will make me look even just the tiniest bit like Cameron Diaz on a bad hair day ($19.99).

And I cannot not talk about my new pairs of shoes; my Imelda Marcos-like nose for the most affordable ones has enabled me to step out in style this fall. For less than 35 dollars I bought an Apostrophe Carrie Cherry Red dress shoes, perfect for my carefree days as a bachelorette and my longing desire to strut like a character from Sex in the City. I also purchased a pair of $2.39-worth Personal Identity Tatami Flip Flops, the casual looks and feel of which I simply adore. Besides, a trip to Havaianas would have cost a lot more!

Anyway, I may have saved big on these online discounts, but I must tell myself that sometimes, the numbers are beside the point. I have a consistent batting average of maxing out two credit cards a year, and this year might see me reach a new high. Not that it’s entirely my fault; credit cards mean interests, annual fees, hassle, overdraft expenses, rates, minimum balances, et cetera et cetera; any talk on plastic money will inspire associations with the dollars and dollars that we have to shell out, as well as all these overhead expenses that we have to manage. Nevertheless, I have not learned to mind, which I should, lest I find myself on the street next year begging for alms. That is so not stylish.

Armed and Dangerous with a Credit Card

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